A very wise old man once said "The more rules you make, the more rule breakers you create." The older I get the more I believe that is true. I'm sort of a rules person. I feel a sense of safety knowing my boundaries. I think the problem starts when we begin making and trying to enforce them on others.
A great story about my youngest rule breaker happened when Jace was about 8. Jace loved the Ninja Turtles, especially Raphael. He got a pair of Ninja Turtle pajamas for Christmas and loved them. Wore them about every day during the holiday break. The morning of the first day back to school he asked if he could wear them so his friends could see them. "Of course not" I said. "Why not?" he responded. "Because you don't wear PJ's to school," There you have it, the rule. "Who says you cant?" he says. "Well you know "THEY". I don't remember how the conversation proceeded, but it didn't end convincing him that the "THEY" group who make the rules know best. It ended more like, "Because I said so, and go get dressed in school cloths before I chop off the head of your Raphael Ninja Turtle doll."
Now I foolishly assumed the war had been won, because we had no other morning battles over the issue. Then I was blind sided by a call from one of my spies, AKA "Aunt Georgie", whom had been brilliantly placed as secretary of the elementary school.
"Did you know that Jace has been wearing his Ninja Turtle PJ's to school for the past 7 or 8 days?" Oh the horror. Isn't it funny how our children's behavior makes us feel it's a reflection of our parenting skills? Those are the times you are tempted to lie and say something like. "Sure I know, I believe in letting the little darling express himself, besides, who says you cant wear pajamas to school? Why, they don't even have the little pee pee slit in the front." Who wants to admit they cant control their 8 year old. Instead I, with a tight lipped response, said "nope! thanks for calling"
I'm sure a smoke detector would have gone off had it been close to my head. My first reaction was to blame someone - Randy! so I called him, "did you know your son has been wearing pajamas the last couple of weeks to school? Don't you pay attention to what is going on?" You could hear the disbelief in his voice that he was getting the blame as he usually was gone or in the shower when they left.
I ran through my mind, trying to remember the previous mornings, checked the laundry - yep the normal mile high pile. I couldn't figure out how he got passed me with them on. Most parents are probably guilty of underestimating the deviousness of an 8 year old brain.
When he got home I did my best CIA interrogation routine, complete with stiff backed chair and a table that I could slap loudly in hopes of intimidating the little stink into spilling his guts. Instead, after just a few minutes, Lance, who had been watching the whole sordid scene, in fear because of his own part in the dirty dead, caved and told the whole story. Jace had been putting the PJ's into his backpack and changing at the bus stop, and then changing again at the bus stop before coming home. Lance had assisted him by blocking cars passing by from seeing him. A mother can only hope that none of those cars saw his tighty whities and boney little white legs freezing in the December weather.
I don't remember what I said or did, or what well deserved punishment Jace may have gotten, but Randy didn't let me cut them into pieces, which was what I wanted to do.
Where are all those old men who write books, when in the moment your asked Why not?" you have a wise answer?
Wednesday, December 9, 2009
Monday, December 7, 2009
More on bonding
So I just have to add this update. Randy read the Red Cloud blog and with big sad eyes asked me what was wrong with bonding. No kidding. I swear I am going to start naming our food, especially the meat. Tonight the chicken breast will be "Tweetie bird", after one of Randy's favorite cartoons.
Red Cloud and the bonding experience
Over the years we have accumulated alot of stories about Randy and his relationship with what should have been the source of our meals. Few animals have ever made it to the dinner plate though. We've had ducks, turkeys, chickens and have never eaten one of them. Oh they usually wind up dinner alright, for the occasional coyote, dog, ours and the neighbors, and even a racoon one year, but not mine. Our 1st pig "Dino" which is a horror story for another time, (maybe a Steven Spielburg movie someday}did make it to the freezer, but Randy refused to eat it and I had to sneak it into meals over the next year.
2 more pigs, cant remember their names although I'm sure Randy can, were hauled off to the butcher. Yes we take them to the butcher now. I happily do so after the Dino" experience. There was the wild pig, but Randy shot the S.O.B. and we fed it to the dogs and coyotes ourselves.
But now we have "RED CLOUD" Randy has been wanting to raise a calf for quite a few years. Dane Lambson happened to mention he had a couple of big calves he was going to sell so I told him we were interested. Dane had brought him from the fields and he was in a horse trailer. Randy and I discussed back and forth wether or not we should buy him, I was in favor but Randy wasn't sure it was the right time, money tight, not a good stall etc. but the deal was sealed when Randy peered into those big warm brown eyes. He said OK lets do it. On the way back to the house Randy tells me that while he was looking in the calfs eyes they BONDED!! Sounds like a sweet touching moment doesn't it? And to make matters worse he announces that his name would be "Red Cloud". "No, no , no" I started shaking my head. "you dont have enough Cherokee or any other Indian blood to name an animal that." I was thinking his name should be "Prime Rib" or "Chuck" or maybe "T-Bone" and I yelled "no bonding allowed, you may NOT bond with my food. "
He had this horrible hurt look on his face and I did feel kind of bad. I told him that we were going to stand this Red, brown eyed calf in a corral for a month or so, fatten him up and haul him to the buthcer so he better get his head wrapped around it. I can handle feeding the stupid worthless duck that poops all over and harrasses my chickens, and even tries to mate them occasionally. (Thats a really sad pathetic sight). but I am not going to feed a calf and keep it as a pet. I asked him what happened to his plans to raise our own beef, so we could have good healthy beef? He said he still wanted to some day, but not this one. He just wanted to walk around with this one and feed and enjoy him.
To answer the obvious question on your mind - yes he does have a dog, two in fact and he walks around with them and feeds them.
This story is still to be continued as "Red Cloud" is still alive. I may have to sneak him out at night and take him to the butcher myself. Mary even told him she heard "Red Cloud" tasted pretty good with A-1 sauce. He didn't think it was funny.
And you thought bonding was a precious thing.
2 more pigs, cant remember their names although I'm sure Randy can, were hauled off to the butcher. Yes we take them to the butcher now. I happily do so after the Dino" experience. There was the wild pig, but Randy shot the S.O.B. and we fed it to the dogs and coyotes ourselves.
But now we have "RED CLOUD" Randy has been wanting to raise a calf for quite a few years. Dane Lambson happened to mention he had a couple of big calves he was going to sell so I told him we were interested. Dane had brought him from the fields and he was in a horse trailer. Randy and I discussed back and forth wether or not we should buy him, I was in favor but Randy wasn't sure it was the right time, money tight, not a good stall etc. but the deal was sealed when Randy peered into those big warm brown eyes. He said OK lets do it. On the way back to the house Randy tells me that while he was looking in the calfs eyes they BONDED!! Sounds like a sweet touching moment doesn't it? And to make matters worse he announces that his name would be "Red Cloud". "No, no , no" I started shaking my head. "you dont have enough Cherokee or any other Indian blood to name an animal that." I was thinking his name should be "Prime Rib" or "Chuck" or maybe "T-Bone" and I yelled "no bonding allowed, you may NOT bond with my food. "
He had this horrible hurt look on his face and I did feel kind of bad. I told him that we were going to stand this Red, brown eyed calf in a corral for a month or so, fatten him up and haul him to the buthcer so he better get his head wrapped around it. I can handle feeding the stupid worthless duck that poops all over and harrasses my chickens, and even tries to mate them occasionally. (Thats a really sad pathetic sight). but I am not going to feed a calf and keep it as a pet. I asked him what happened to his plans to raise our own beef, so we could have good healthy beef? He said he still wanted to some day, but not this one. He just wanted to walk around with this one and feed and enjoy him.
To answer the obvious question on your mind - yes he does have a dog, two in fact and he walks around with them and feeds them.
This story is still to be continued as "Red Cloud" is still alive. I may have to sneak him out at night and take him to the butcher myself. Mary even told him she heard "Red Cloud" tasted pretty good with A-1 sauce. He didn't think it was funny.
And you thought bonding was a precious thing.
Ideas
Several of these stories I have already written, just need to get them into my blog. I wanted to put down a list of some of them, and hope my family will give me additional ideas of things they remember.
1)The Amway years - subtitled how to run off all of your friends and most of your family.
2)HGH shots - does this crap make your feet grow
3)The local assylum - the employer of half the town and most of my family
4)Lambson reunions - my female siblings want to rename them: "the convention of cheaters, beaters and whinners." Or possibly."dirty old men and the women and chilren who love them anyway"
5)The lists, written in red on the yellow legal pad
6)"I hate the Back Street Boys" subtitled Jace's near death experience
7)Lance and Colters state track meet. Gold medal brought to you by the yellow hair gang.
8)Shannon and the WOW walkers
9)Reese and Jace tarring the dog instead of the roof.
10)The Wild Pescado pig
11)Dino - a sad pig tale- or- real men kill and butcher there own animals
12)Jace- state track champ - or the mom who drugged her own son
13)Pinachle - shoes must be worn!!!!
14)Really, hit me in the face as hard as you can. (Colter)
15)Red Cloud and the bonding experience
16)The smelly goat girls (real ranchers raise cows)
17)Jeremiah was a Bull frog and other wood cutting experiences.
18) Robert and the Steve Austin doll - your going to make my son gay
19)Lance, Shay, Jace, Ashley, Colter Lindsey and the coach bay. or what could have been titled "And they never saw her again"
1)The Amway years - subtitled how to run off all of your friends and most of your family.
2)HGH shots - does this crap make your feet grow
3)The local assylum - the employer of half the town and most of my family
4)Lambson reunions - my female siblings want to rename them: "the convention of cheaters, beaters and whinners." Or possibly."dirty old men and the women and chilren who love them anyway"
5)The lists, written in red on the yellow legal pad
6)"I hate the Back Street Boys" subtitled Jace's near death experience
7)Lance and Colters state track meet. Gold medal brought to you by the yellow hair gang.
8)Shannon and the WOW walkers
9)Reese and Jace tarring the dog instead of the roof.
10)The Wild Pescado pig
11)Dino - a sad pig tale- or- real men kill and butcher there own animals
12)Jace- state track champ - or the mom who drugged her own son
13)Pinachle - shoes must be worn!!!!
14)Really, hit me in the face as hard as you can. (Colter)
15)Red Cloud and the bonding experience
16)The smelly goat girls (real ranchers raise cows)
17)Jeremiah was a Bull frog and other wood cutting experiences.
18) Robert and the Steve Austin doll - your going to make my son gay
19)Lance, Shay, Jace, Ashley, Colter Lindsey and the coach bay. or what could have been titled "And they never saw her again"
Introduction to my Family History
I have been wanting to start writing my family history but didn't want it to read like the heading of Genesis 25; Abraham marries,has seed, dies and is buried in a cave. Or like Genesis chapter 6; Noah was a just man and perfect in his generations.(The idea being "Cindy" is interchangeable with Noah) And the world was filled with wickedness.....Noah built an ark....." Where did all the poop go? Can you imagine the stench. I cant stand a litter box after a couple of days even if it does have baking soda "for a clean fresh scent".
So I decided to write stories. We sit around at family gatherings and tell them and so many are really funny. My family, in-laws included, have provided pages and pages of story material - so why not?
For now I'm not going to worry about the time line. I'm just going to write as I think of them. I decided to take it out of my notebook and put it into a blog so that my family could see it in progress and help clear up some of the fuzzier details, or tell me that my memory is failing and I made it all up. Either way it seems like a much more enjoyable way to take on what has always felt like a daunting task, best suited for the old with nothing else to do, (shut up Georgie, I know what you were thinking.)
Then some day, I will get it put into a book for future generations to read and laugh at. Hopefully these stories will let my posterity know alittle about me and my life.
Happy reading
So I decided to write stories. We sit around at family gatherings and tell them and so many are really funny. My family, in-laws included, have provided pages and pages of story material - so why not?
For now I'm not going to worry about the time line. I'm just going to write as I think of them. I decided to take it out of my notebook and put it into a blog so that my family could see it in progress and help clear up some of the fuzzier details, or tell me that my memory is failing and I made it all up. Either way it seems like a much more enjoyable way to take on what has always felt like a daunting task, best suited for the old with nothing else to do, (shut up Georgie, I know what you were thinking.)
Then some day, I will get it put into a book for future generations to read and laugh at. Hopefully these stories will let my posterity know alittle about me and my life.
Happy reading
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